Limiting myself

I know it’s been a while.  For that, I’m sorry.  The thing is, I’ve been feeling really well and because of that, I’ve been able to get things done around here.

We painted the inside of the house.  Well, WE didn’t paint it – we hired someone to do it for us and it looks nice.  I learned one thing though – NEVER trust myself to choose paint colors.  With one eye, I am finding that I can’t match things very well and although the paint job they did was terrific, my color choices weren’t.  That’s okay – with three kids and  a dog in the house I’m sure we’ll be painting again.

I made a stocking for my son for Christmas, so that took a bunch of time.  I’d take a picture of it and post it for you to see, but unfortunately it’s already out in the attic of the garage.  I’ll have to do that when we decorate for Christmas 2012.

I survived Christmas and all of its natural stressors without any relapse.  In fact, I think it was the nicest Christmas we’ve had!   I got plenty of rest and didn’t sweat the small stuff at all.  I’m quite proud of myself!

I’m feeling really well.  REALLY well.  Yes, I still have those super exhaustion days, but my good days are really good and for that I’m thankful.  I’ve taken the dog for walks.  I’m cooking dinner again.  I’m enjoying life.  I’m happy.

But today was a slap in the face for me.  I love to volunteer, and if you’ve read other posts in my blog, you’ll know that I was recommended (and followed through) to stop volunteering and just concentrate on my health.  I did that.  I quit everything – Home and School president, Marketing committee, Catholic Identity committee, Destination Imagination, Strategic Planning committee, playground duty, library aide – (that’s all I can think of – I’m sure there is more).  I quit it all.

But since I’ve been feeling better, I thought it wouldn’t hurt to start volunteering at school again.  I love being with the kids and I love to help, so a couple hours of my time wouldn’t hurt me, would it?  Surely it wouldn’t.

I was wrong.

Today was the Scholastic Book Fair at our school.  This is my FAVORITE thing to volunteer for – who doesn’t LOVE to be around books all day?  Being an English/History major in college gave me a sick love of books,  so working a book fair that is held in a school library AND add school kids to the picture – well that’s pure heaven to me.

I volunteered today from 10:00am until 12:00pm.  I ran the register with the exception of getting a camera from the office for the principal.  The rest of the time I was sitting down and helping kids with their purchases.  I straightened a few books, but that work was minimal.

About 1/2 hour after leaving the school I started to get major pins and needles.  Major.  When I get pins and needles like this, I consider it a warning sign that I’ve done too much.  The pins and needles happen from just under my chest down to my mid thigh (on both sides of the body) and the feeling is similar to a hand or foot falling asleep.  It’s not painful, but it is bothersome.  Normally when I get this symptom, I immediately lay down to rest.  I get this feeling when I’ve physically worked too hard on something – for instance – if I go for a very long walk, or if I walk on a treadmill (I don’t know why the treadmill bothers me, but it does), or if I do some jumping jacks.  Anything that jars the lesion on my spinal cord will cause me to get the pins and needles feeling.

Why sitting at a book fair did this, I don’t know.  What I do know is that it ticked me off to no end.  I thought I was doing great and those stupid pins and needles remind me of how sick I really am.

But on a lighter note, I really am thankful I volunteered today.  It was so good to be in the school again.  It was so good to see the kids again.  It was so good to see friends of mine that I haven’t seen in a while.  It was so good to be needed or at least feel that way.  Unfortunately, it was not good to know that despite all of the rest I’ve gotten over the last six months AND the fact that I feel 100% better than I did last year, I still have to limit myself in all that I do.

I used to think the sky was the limit.  Now I’m realizing that isn’t so….not if you have NMO.

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This entry was posted in Devic's Disease, Multiple Sclerosis, Neuromyelitis Optica, NMO, Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to Limiting myself

  1. Corenae O'Green says:

    Michelle…you are a gem! Just don’t volunteer but stop in on events you would have and stay for a short time and leave. You will be a help while you are there but can limit it to help maintain your health. LOVE YOU OODLES!!!!!!!!!!!!

  2. Cori – how are YOU feeling? I’ve been praying for you my friend.

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